Heeeeeeeeeeeee's Back

Don't blink. That really is him.

Yes. Him.

The same man we once took for dead, kicked to the curb by a crumbling Tampa Bay squad, it seemed as if football for Mr. Martin Gramatica was all but over. The only thing that seemed automatic about the situation was a group Gramatica flight back to Argentina.

Alas, the beleaguered kicker has made it back to center stage once more, this time in the NFC East for the Dallas Cowboys. He's already tested the waters in the NFC South, and AFC East (twice actually). Too hot, apparently. Now, Parcells and the 'Boys are counting on Martin to solidify what was a shaky kicking game with Mike Vanderjagt at the helm.

And, on the subject of Vanderjagt, how quickly do fortunes change? Just several months ago, he was the recipient of a new contract, at over 5 million dollars. Fat deal, fat change. Fat chance. He's been released, and in an one of the most ironic and deranged attempts to search for consistency, the Cowboys have opted to try out Gramatica. He's been with the Colts twice, and the Patriots practice squad once. Neither worked out well. To be honest though, neither did his last two years in Tampa.


As from last week, some more notes:

• Jay Cutler is officially taking over for Jake Plummer in Denver. And it only took, what, 11 weeks? I figure this is a wise move from coach Mike Shanahan. He usually shuffles runningbacks, so why not try it with quarterbacks. The problem? He's in the thick of a playoff race and Cutler's chances of survival and success are about the same as the number of NFL passes he's thrown.
• After this week's most recent debacle, Michael Vick, fed up with the way things have been going, decided to give the fans in Atlanta the finger as he exited to the lockerroom, following a 31-13 defeat. Maybe its just me, but I have an issue with this. Not the finger part, but the direction of the finger. The fans in Atlanta aren't the ones who can't catch. No, that distinction belongs to any WR or TE on the Falcons. And, contrary to popular belief, that is their job. You can spew on all you want about Vick's innaccuracy, but ultimately, someone has to catch the ball. Bums like Roddy White, and the rest of those misfits just aren't going to get it done.
• On the subject of making a comeback to the NFL, the Hillsborough Kid, Ricky Proehl has been signed by the Colts. One white reciever replacing another (Brandon Stokely). That's how it ought to be.
• Here's big news: "Holmes will not return to Chiefs this season", reports the AP. Wow. That's some kind of breaking story.
• Tell me you're not the only one amused by the annual list of Hall Of Fame ballotees. Of course, the guys we all knew would be there...the Scott Brosius's and Devon White's of the world. But honestly, what is Eric Davis doing on that list?
• Randy Wolf. 8 million dollars. One year. Seems reasonable, doesn't it? Lest we forget, Mr. Wolf has pitched in a combined 25 games in the past two seasons. Also, don't let that 5.56 ERA from last season through you off. He is a lefty, and a crafty one at that.
• Finally, the Red Sox have committed to trading Manny Ramirez. Really, this time they are going to do it. I'm not kidding. If it's on Yahoo! Sports, it has got to be true. They're going to sign J.D. "Power and Associates" Drew, and then deal Manny to San Fran. Honest, this time they're not joking around. Seriously. They will do it. They're going to do it. They're going to try to do it. Well, they'll give it their best shot. Uhhh, they might not do it. It seems like its too far fetched for them to actually do it. But, no, they really are going to do it this time. Maybe.
• Again, on the topic of comebacks, perenially soft and injured swingman Derek Anderson has been signed by the Charlotte Bobcats in an effort to....well, we're not exactly sure.
• Another funny headline: "Whether it's Thomas or Brown as coach, Marbury still not sure how to play" Can we just get it over with and put this guy out of his misery already. How many times does he need to prove that he's a worhtless human being and basketball player. Ultimately, it seems fairly simple to me. When coaches have tried to "coach" him, he struggles. When he can do his own thing and basically play selfishly, he'll put up numbers. There's a winner for you.
• What's most suprising about the Spurs first road loss of the season, this a month into the schedule? Not that it took this long, but that Andris Biedrins, a man few outside of fantasy nerds have ever even heard of, almost single handedly turned the trick last night. He had 6 blocks, 3 of which came on Tim Duncan in the final quarter. Way to go Andy.
• After the "signing of the year" of Ben Wallace, the Chicago Bulls have truly floundered to start the season. True, they opened the year trouncing the Heat, but since then, they've lost 9 of 12. And one of those 3 wins came against the Knicks. The Bulls, as I modestly figured, have had a hard time scoring (18th, just under 97 ppg). This shouldn't surprise anyone as starters Chris Duhon and Ben Wallace are scoring 13 ppg. Together.